Ark's review workshop!

[iNathanM]

OMG
I am getting pretty pissed...(no not really )
but it is annoying, i see the review thread alot, waiting for poeple's reviews...but instead...
i get this review request...again...and again...and AGAIN!
i think enoch did this same type of lecture to someone else...but a bit more angry
so...PLEASE FOR THE SAKE OF EVERYONE STOP REQUESTING THIS REVIEW!!!

Oh sorry!

I posted it around as I wanted a review on my level, i didnt realise there was a limit on how many people I could ask.
Im still getting used to the Forum, but thanks for telling me, I won't in the future.

Sorry again for posting it around

(I deleted my other requests, I only have a request to Ark now )

[Mrgenji]

Meh ignore sackman, he's being wierd for some reason.

anywho ark - got a job for you, no rush though.

"Ninjas vs. Pirates" - @Mrgenji

Been a long time since I posted a level so lets see if I've improved at all

(Link in the sig if you need more info)

[arklon]

The Flooder

by Inathanm

The the story of flooded is simple enough and actually the word simple describes this level to the letter. An enemy of LBP known as the flooded is going to ya you guessed it, flood the world. I was told that this is the creators first level and it is pretty much the poster child for all first levels cause it pretty much has every thing we all come to expect when we hear "first level" in spades.
I have always been haunted by the question, how do you rate a first time level? Do you go easy on it? or do you just be honest and give it like it is? My answer is honesty is the best route but I also think for reviews like this the most helpful and best thing you can do is also give tips and suggestions and tell them how best they can improve their levels. So for the rest of the review I'm gonna point out what's wrong and then give opinions on how you can best improve yourself.

Tip one: Be patient

I noticed a lot of stuff here where you just hastily put something in and went on your way, For example one of your characters is imbedded in the ground and its obvious you just put him there and did not fix the imprints he left in the ground when you placed him. You should always try to fix stuff like this and usually its not that big a deal cause its very small and sometimes even hard to notice and its not even worth nit picking about but THIS one was not small....


wow this guy must have some very hard steps, remind me never to play kick ball with him...


You should take your time when you make a level and not get into a rush, the longer you wait do to taking time to edit and tinker with your level before publishing it makes it all the more worth it when you finally do publish


Tip 2: Backgrounds

Using the mm backgrounds is fine but in my opinion you should not just rely on that alone and have the entire level with that same background, spice it up with some of your own backgrounds mixed in or just do all your backgrounds. If the only thing you actually make is just the ground then it just does not feel like you took much time or work all that hard on a level.

Tip 2: Be creative!

This is the most important thing I can tell you. When making stuff, like enemies and bosses and other such things try to brainstorm, put some thought into it. Try to make something new and interesting. Put a lot of detail into the design and look or else once again it will look like a rush job


is this boat built on a floating banana?

This is your boat, not much to it. Stuff like this is what you should put a little more effort inand when you make your own contraption or something like that you want people to go "wow" or "oh that's nice" or something to that affect when they see it. My motto is if you build something try to build something ya can be proud enough to show off.

The same goes for making enemies, a little creative thought can go a long way.


I am arklon! The master of finding easy and cheap way to take out monsters!

Here is one the minions of the flooder, not very memorable, I honestly believe you can do better then this. Use the edit tool, use stickers and decorations, just let your imagination fly and see what you end up with.

Now that takes us to the boss fight, the flooder himself


I have been standing in this spot for the last five minutes and he has not shot me once, why was I supposed to be scared of this guy again?


Yeah the picture pretty much says it all. Once again be creative! Don't just use a plain cutout but make it something unique, make it your OWN. Put some of your own flavor and style into the creature and make a inathonm style boss and not just a plain cut out. Also I did stand in that spot for five minutes and did not get shot once, then I accidentally got rid of my gun while taking the picture so I had to run back and get another one and not once did he ever kill me. Your climactic boss should be a tad more intimidating and challenging.

I'm not trying to be mean, I just want to help ya improve your level and creating skills and maybe after you have made your second level its something you can truly be proud of.
Normally I break down my reviews in rated sections but I decided to give ya the tips instead but here is a little breakdown on the level

Level Design 2

Very little effort put into this at all. all ya really made were some floating platforms

scenery: 3

Once again not much to look at, very little decorations or stickers is used.

Originality 3

A mad man out to flood the world is interesting but there is no innovative plat forming or puzzle solving or obstacles at all.

Fun Factor: 3

You grab some sponges to raise the water level, take a VERY small boat ride and shot a gun a lot, really not a lot of interesting things to do here


Grade: 3

A typical first level, most every bodies first levels were like this so don't fret. Just use my suggestions and suggestions from other people and try to improve yourself and your next levels are bound to be good.


Mr Genji I will get on your level first chance I get

[iNathanM]

Thanks for the Review Thanks for all the tips these will be very useful when I get round to making another level. Once again Thanks

[Teuciont]

I really hope I'm not doing anything wrong by asking for a review but only having been a member for a few days But if it is okay, I'd like you to review my level please
"Valkyrie Profile: Lezard's Lust for Power"
PSN_ID: "xXTeuciontXx"

Feel free to delete this post or ask me to if I'm doing something wrong, and thank you if you do get around to it.

[arklon]

I have no rules or restrictions. There is a level ahead of yours but I will get to your review eventually

[Teuciont]

Thank you very much

[arklon]

Ninjas vs pirates

By Mrgenji

Right off the bat I knew that my eyes were in for a feast with these level, as soon as you appear you are greeted by a very well build house and you find that Ninja town is under attack by pirates and you are soon sent off to find the mystical grandmaster to seek advice.
Like I have already mentioned this is a beautiful level, the level design itself is excellent and everything is glossy and easy on the eyes. On your way to the grandmaster you are greeted with a little plat forming some enemy fighting and a few other random obstacles. The enemies in this level is also top notch and are brilliantly made. I remember playing MM's Pirate level and seeing the skull version of their ghostly butler and thinking that they could of been a little bit more creative with their enemies. Here the creator takes MM's own stickers and puts their enemies to shame with his superior creations.


bringing a cannon to a bubble popping fight.... what a cheater.

The visual treats never end here and you are even greeted to some very nice effects when you meet the grandmaster. The grandmaster sends you to speak to the pirate captain and from there is a bit more plat forming till you get to the boat.


where is all the black pajama wearing ninjas at? Man if pirates ever attacked Scorpion or Sub-zero's towns, the place would be covered in blood already...


The boat itself is wonderfully built and designed and looks great but what impressed me the most about it is how its used. Sure you do take a boat ride and machine rides are very far from new in Little Big Planet and we have already seen zillions of boats since water has hit our shores but here there is a tad bit of game play threw in with the boat. During the boat ride at several spots you are giving a warning bell telling you that you are about to be attacked and you must stop and run for the safe part of the boat before the cannon balls get you. I thought this was a very nice touch to the typical boat ride.



I would call this the love boat but the cannons off in the distance headed towards my head says otherwise.

The water here is not over used but rather is just part of the level itself, part of the background and scenery and it really is stunning combined with the look of the level. Its simple and old school, you fall in the water, you die. Apparently ninja's are very poor swimmers.


finally the fish decide its pay back time for the sushi thing....

The nit picks I have is that its a pretty easy level and the game play elements and obstacles are not all that new but they are still fun and far from boring. Also the level is a tad on the short side and ends pretty abruptly but I'm pretty sure the therm space was about to explode considering how detailed the level is. Also I could of used a boss but its obvious that this is just the first half of the series and more then likely the second level will probably feature some kind of boss fight so this little slip can be forgiven. Also I never saw the little surprise about why the pirates were attacking coming but after thinking about it I guess I should have.

Level Design: 10

This level is just wonderfully made and built, found very little glitches and the ones I did found too small to even be that annoying. Oh and one more thing, this level is mostly built out of just cardboard yet you would never know it. Most who plays this level will never notice this fact and its still beyond beautifull and designed even with the creative restriction. This is the added feature that earned this catagory a ten.

Scenery:9

I have said this many times again and I will say it again, this is a very beautiful and polished looking level. The enemies are great to look at as well as just about everything else in here.


Dead men tell no tales yet they sure do give a mean stabbing in the back...

Originality: 6

Ninja's vs pirates or actually anything vs anything is far from new but boy did it make a great level. The obstacles have been seen in other variations before and maybe some nice puzzles could have been thrown in to expand the length

Fun factor: 9

This is a blast to play and I recommend everyone play this one. Its short but fun and well worth the time spent.

Grade: 8

Now go play this thing, it deserves the attention.

[arklon]

Valkyrie Profile: Lezard's Lust for Power
By xXTeuciontXx



At first this level looks like your typical "first level" and starts off with some wide open spots with just running that makes it seem a tad empty and a bunch of the usually first level trappings. This is kinda misleading in a way cause it does get better. The first enemies you see are just round burning balls on wheels, yeah typical but these did amuse me because they look like the bombs from the Mario games. So its not enough to blow up itself, but its gonna set itself on fire too because its just THAT hardcore. Yeah these don't explode but the thought amused me anyway and the real punch line happens later on when one of the flaming balls attacks you with a knife. This cracked me up to no end, its covered in fire but to make sure its lethalness is to the max it has brought along a knife just for an extra advantage. I thought this was random and funny but I'm odd that way.



when you find yourself mugged by a ball of fire is when its time to find a new neighborhood to live in.

This is based on the Valkyrie profile games and since I have not played any and am clueless on them I cannot say if the story line and character design here does them justice.The story is about a human who betrays his masters and goes insane and manages to amass a great deal of power. You go to fight him and are soon ambushed on the field of battle by plasma shooting stars (yeah I know..only in Little Big Planet) and are killed. You are one lucky sack it seems cause out of all the fallen sacks on the battlefield the gods choose to resurrect you and send you on a journey to stop the mad man, It seems the bad guy has even amassed enough power to corrupt some gods into joining his cause and now things are much worse.
The a little big planet level this is a pretty good and complex story and from here the scenery gets better. Once you start your trek tot he heavens you find yourself jumping from floating columns of ground that has trees and stuff still growing on them. This is a fantasy idea I have always liked, its even used in Avatar. Anyway there is mention that this is "sky world" or something like that and it just sent me back to the old video games were you had fire world, ice world, water world and so on and each level and designed after its element. Here you are high in the sky jumping on floating platforms and it does have a nostalgic old school game flavor to it and I really liked this. Yeah its not all that decorated but it works and the look of it is perfect for what its supposed to be.



I would start singing stair way to heaven but I will spare you the horrible pain

Once you get to heaven you learn things are much worse then you thought and this whole area has a nice after life look to it and I was pretty much impressed with the whole "sky" section of this map.


awww did I miss nap time AGAIN? I hate it when that happens!

You do end up going in doors and that' is where this falls in design again. The indoor areas are bland and dull and have very little decoration at all. Also the design in the buildings just look kinda off and its very easy to get squished by all the little bitty holes and cracks in the surfaces. However this is where the level's creature design kicks into high gear and gone are the flaming Mario bombs and instead you got pretty cool looking walking giant things. Some of the walking giants seem to have no heads though so I can imagine why they are so peeved off.


One day I am gonna to have to make a level were all the user created enemies rebel against their creators for giving them cruel design features such as having no head..

There was something that bothered me about the creatures, not the design but how you fight them. A lot of them are flinging three layered burning logs or massive amounts of plasma to where you cannot get anywhere near them and must shot them off screen, which requires no skill and causes the player to miss out on seeing the creature well. I would of never been able to get a good luck at a lot of them if I had no taken pictures of them from off screen. This is just one of my pet peeves, I HATE having to shoot enemies from off screen, it just runs it and requires little monster fighting skills. Speaking of crazy shooting creatures, there is a rock monster then that instantly starts shooting massive amounts of fire stuff when you try to star walking towards it, the stuff comes up before you even see the thing and its VERY hard to dodge. Stuff like this is not good when you do not have infinite check points because things like this is unfair. How I got passed it was just plain dumb luck, not skill or technique or strategy at all, I just ran in jumping like crazy after dying over and over and over and got lucky.

I found one major problem with the level design too, there is an area where you must kill a big giant that you cannot seem to kill with a gun. It tells you to go back and look for something to use and I see a platform going down and so I take it and end up falling on a platform with a life check and in front of it is dissolve material. I was stuck and unable to kill myself to get out cause the life point was right there BUT I found the dissolve wall was not stuck very good and was able to wedge, yank and pull it out and continue on skipping the whole part with the giant.

Now this takes us to the boss and I just gotta say.... very well done. The thing is impressive and cool looking. its like a big skeletal jackal thing standing on its hind legs. Sure a few things on him could of been designed a tad better like his flaming sword but he was still pretty cool and not super easy or super frustrating hard. For once the challenge on this enemy was almost just right.


maybe if I give him a big bag of Alpo he will go away...



Level Design: 4

The sky area is great but the beginning is very open and empty and the inside parts were dull and ugly and need a lot of decorations and tool editing work.. I was able to skip an entire area and would have been stuck if I had not, this should really be fixed somehow. Plus you can see dark matter in several places and there is some areas where the gound and plateforms themselves are made out of dark matter, this is usualy considered a major creating no no.

Scenery 4

Once again the sky part was good and the open had some nice designs but the dungeons are just ugly and uninspired and there is very little decorating any where.

Originality 5

It gets points for the nice story and for some of the creature designs but the actual game play and obstacles are far from new, just a bunch of swinging and gun shooting and dodging.

Fun Factor 5

This is fun, the game play while not too fresh is still entertaining and the added dose of old adventure game nostalgia certainly helps. Though there are some bits of extreme difficulty that will can be very frustrating and cruel. Plus shooting enemies off screen is just not all that exciting to me.



GRADE: 5


This is actually really good work for a first level, usually first levels don't get an average five or even close to it so this leads me to believe that once you hone your skills and learn you are gonna deliver us some awesome and great things in the future. Cause if you fix those complaints I had, the glitches, the decorations and empty sections and stuff this would be much higher then a five.